Fear & Loathing Through Parenthood: Look Who’s Talking, Too

Yep, I’m preggers again and still have 90s movies delusions about life

It’s happened! I’m once again pregnant and once again all over the place with emotions and morning sickness, food aversions and cravings, all the fun stuff, but now we have a two year old in the mix!

What’s been happening? Also, warning! this is going to be a longer post since I haven’t posted anything in a spell… #sorrynotsorry

The bitch is back!

First off, I had been feeling so drained and out of it I completely neglected anything remotely extra in life, like this blog. So for any avid followers I apologize! I didn’t die, just felt like it some days.

Before I found out I was with child I was having INSANE mood swings. I’m talking like I was 15 again and fighting with my parents about my curfew. Ups, downs, and all around with bad moods, crying bouts and then feeling totally, eerily fine.

Yeah…I know some days when my husband looked at me this is what he saw…

At my first doctor visit I brought it up to my doctor and she said it really is mostly hormones (thank you pituitary gland!) but if I felt I needed/wanted they have counseling services available. Side note: it is refreshing to know that mental health is finally a conversation everyone is having, working towards de-stigmatizing, and being addressed!

Tough Titties! Also before I took that life-changing pee, my breasts were tender as a couple water balloons about to pop. They get a little sore around my time of the month but this time they were tight AF. (And have been! Apparently after your first they turn into bombs the next time your pregnant. Welp, bombs away!)

From: Yay I’m pregnant again! To…yay I have to be pregnant again.

Pretty much…

Around the six week mark my morning sickness/on-again-off-again nausea kicked in. This is not a fun phase. Also, as anyone knows or will soon find out, every pregnancy is different. With my first the morning sickness phase lasted about two weeks. With this little squirt it finally started subsiding a few days ago and I am 12 weeks as of yesterday. (If you’re doing math that’s about 6 weeks of feeling like dog ass #yikes)

No energy. This is something I’m not used to and hoping will subside shortly too but, as my doctor pointed out, my body is two years older and I’m chasing around a 2 year old, so chances are the exhaustion is going to be a constant. Super!

I haven’t told work yet (waiting till about 14/16 if I can), so work is pretty much a nightmare. Aside from feeling like garbage I know I’m looking a little fraught. I’m addition to the tiredness & morning sickness the other cool thing my body does during pregnancy is a Marvel-strength sense of smell. I can smell if my neighbors opened a bottle of wine from down the street, so smelling your coworkers homemade curry being reheated next to someone who brought in chili and someone else eating salmon is enough to make you hide in the bathroom.

I really don’t mean to be such a downer. Pregnancy is a mind-blowing miracle. I am so thankful to be able to have children, I know too many people trying having difficulties so I’ll pick things up here with some positivity and a few remedies that have worked for me thus far.

I mean look at this little angel! To think there’s a second one brewing inside is really heart melting.

Things kept me off the ledge during the first trimester:

I found out I was pregnant during the holiday season. Watching my daughter take in the Christmas magic was soul warming. She just turned 2 and if you want to talk about growing, the growth spurts and learning her little body has been doing the last few months, even weeks, is amazing. Watching her absorb it all is fascinating and entirely adorable. Enjoy the good moments when you can.

Christmas cookies (at the time, now just baking in general). I replaced my beloved winter ales, dark vinos, and spicy gins with sugar. I don’t care. Baking occupies time, my daughter LOVES helping and I mean who can complain about cookies?

In addition to my prenatals I learned to take a daily fiber supplement. Which has helped prevent the ol’ pain in the ass, constipation (that comes from the prenatals in case you’re a first timer). Also, to help ease my morning sickness my doctor recommended B6 (50mg, once in the morning and once before bed) and also Unisom (half tablet at night). These are both over the counter. The B6 definitely has helped and the Unisom will give you a good night’s rest.

Make sure you surround yourself with supportive people. I hope you have a partner that helps no questions asked. Parents, friends and/or siblings to have your back and help you out. When you have a little maniac running around it definitely adds a layer of exhaustion you didn’t realize existed. Having a group of lovely souls to support you through it is vital. Find your tribe.

Lastly and most importantly, take it easy on yourself. This mindset has probably been the most effective for me (aside from sleeping as much as humanely possible). Seriously! Being pregnant is tough. You’re limited in what you can do and eat (and drink), feel like constant crap, tired, moody, break outs!, and just everything feels like it sucks! Until one morning you wake up and the clouds clear a little. You realize you don’t feel like puking and before you know it it’s midnight and you’re wide awake, writing a blog post again. 😊 hang in there momma! You got this.

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